Evaluation [Part 1 & 2]

Deadline

so the deadline for everything to be handed in is tomorrow, and I've pretty much finished everything but my evaluation, which I'm going to have to do while I'm on holiday. yesterday i ripped my film opening to a DVD to show in class today (hopefully.) and maybe get some feedback from the rest of the class so far all my feedback has been really positive, most people love the first section where the girl is walking down the hall in time with the music.
i went back through all my files on my laptop from all 3 of my previous ideas to see how much i'd done and i was suprised to find that i had 125 unedited video files and 21 edited sections i didn't realise i'd videoed so much!

[Dare] Final Edit

three different ideas and i finally got the narrative together to do this.

i like this one best out of the three different videos i did because it flows smoothly, the narrative makes sense, the editing is edgey and fast and at times, timed with the audio which is exactly how i like to edit

i made a video with clips from my orgianl ideas and an explanation of what i liked and what i didn't like.

[Dare] Synopsis

Dares full story

Beginning
At the beginning of the film the audience's hears a girl die, they don't know why or how but it looks like a hit to the head, then they're introduced to the main character, a detective who has a lot of experience with murder crimes and serial killers he lists all the things he knows about serial killers and we audience sees someone doing exactly what the detective is say, this someone is the serial killer, the main bad guy. it becomes the detective's job to stop and catch the killings before they escalate. Like Todorvo's theory, this is the disequilibrium.

Middle
More people are murdered from the same school, they all have ID cards on them like the one in my film opening, they are all killed with a blow to the head but no weapon is found the detective suspects its someone from the school who is the serial killer so he starts talking to students, teachers and anyone else he can find to see if anything suspicious has been happening. when no further clues turn up the school is closed until further notice for everyone's safety but the killings don't stop in fact they increase.

End
the detective notices an inconstancy with the killings (location and how hard the victim is hit) and decided its more then one killer, he hangs around the locations that the killings have been happen and finds his two suspects who are the serial killers, it turns out that they have been playing an extremely sick game of dare to kill the people in there school they don't like. they get caught and locked up for life and equilibrium is restored.

[Dare] Recce

Locations i considered but didn't use:

In the first shot where the girl is walking down the hall, i had thought about using the hall at my house but it doesn't fit the genre because the walls are purple and there's nothing really sinister or creepy about it and there's lots of door handles sticking out everywhere which would mess a shot up, on the other hand the lighting is pretty good.
a lot of my shots are close-ups on the serial killer doing things, to do those i needed a room with a lot of light this room has light, but there's a lot of stuff in the way and it would be a pain to move everything around just to get enough light in.

This room is in a similar situation to the first, plenty of light but lots of stuff in the way, and its right next to the kitchen so there is almost always noise in the background i did use the drum kit in the picture to add audio though.
i sat on the kitchen floor while filming most of my serial killer shots because it the right amount of light that i wanted, i filmed while everyone else was out so i didn't have to worry about space or background noise and if i got any of the floor in the shot it would be okay because the wood looks rustic and old like the wood in the first shot of my opening.
i used this room for my detective scene, i covered the curtains because they're purple and i wanted to cut the natural light off and use lamps to light only parts that i wanted, i also cleared the desks off and only had props i wanted on them there.

[Dare] Lighting/Mise en Scene

I chose this location because its got the stereotypical old fashioned look that a lot of mystery films have in them and the lighting is dim but light enough to see whats going on, i also liked the stream of light across the floor, i thought that was effective as well.

i made her walk down the centre of the shot so the audiences eyes focus on that and nothing else.

it was a really bright day when i shot this section, which was good because i didn't have to worry about it being to dark when i edited it, though the brightness doesn't really fit the mood so i had to add darkening effects on to the clip in Sony Vegas

i was stood on a ladder when i filmed this shot, i wanted a high angled shot for two reasons. reason one, so that i could get the whole body in the shot and see everything on it because i specifically gave her a card in her hand and a bag which would come into play later in the film. and reason two, to make her look small and weak, if i'd done it from another angle you wouldn't be able to see the whole body very well and it wouldn't have the same impact on the audience

i made some blood with washing up liquid and red and blue food dye, though my sister wasn't to happy when i got it in her hair, but i needed it to look like she was bleeding from her head and it worked!

in this shot i had to cover-up my sisters curtains because they were purple and clear her desk so that were wasn't teddies and things in the shot and i put the things that she had worn in the previous shots on the desk so it looked like the evidence put out on a table like they do in CSI just not as high-tech, i had a test tubes set out as well from an old microscope i have.

I shot this from a side on angle so you could see the detectives face, and that was is looking at the card. if i'd done it from a front angle the audience wouldn't have felt involved like they were there with him because they'd be where the desk was which doesn't work!

because i'd covered up the curtains it made the room really dark, but that's what i wanted, i then used a lamp to aim the light at Darius' (the guy in the picture) face and the evidence, it still wasn't light enough so i added some lighting effects on in Sony Vegas afterward.

[Dare] Soundtrack

In my new soundtrack, I've kept the original first few shots and audio as they were because they were good, the other parts i either edited myself or downloaded from Freeplaymusic.com.

George scream unedited and edited by whiteisblack

i took a clip of my sister (who plays the girl who dies in my opening) screaming, then edited so it sounded more mysterious in 'Sony Vegas sound forge audio studio'

i also added my own drum beats behind another song, it acts like a heart beat i think, i had originally intend to do the whole soundtrack on the drums but i don't think that fits the genre at all so i thought it sounded effective behind a song from Freeplaymusic that didn't have any beat to it.

the highlighted part is the drum beats behind the song, on the purple layer (track 6) just after he highlighted section is the narrative voice over audio, i split it up and spaced it out so there were slight pauses between because it was spoken quickly and didn't have an suspense to it

also before the highlited bit on the green layer (track 5) there is some audio i record using my sisters guitar and amp, i put the guitar to close to the amp so it made a weird noise then recorded it and split it so that it sounded like it was stuttering which gives it an air of mystery that fits the genre, it also scares the audience.

Miss Sutton said it gave her goose bumps, and a friend of mine said he wouldn't go see this film because he doesn't like things that are scary or jumpy. i think that's mostly down to the soundtrack as its a key part of my opening and any film opening as it sets the mood.

[Dare] Storyboard/Script

The whole of this first section is fast passed with fade to blacks between shots and some shots will be black and white or inverted to make it more distorted.

all of this section is for the credits, inspiration taken from the opening of 'Se7en.'



Script

[Darius speaking, who plays the detective]

It starts with one
There's no guilt behind it
so they move onto there next victim
Serial killers i mean
as a detective i see them a lot
you have to put yourself in there mind to catch them
Obsessive behavior
like stalking
documenting
note taking on there victim
anyone would think they were you average Joe
but they're wicked smart
calculating
organized
clean to the point of obsession
you have to able to spot the signs and clues right from the first drop of blood.

[Every new line is there's a pause]

[Dare] Pitch

View more presentations from DaniGoRawr.

scrapping chick flick idea

i had a talk with my teachers and decided to go back to my first draft,
the problem with my first draft was that the plot didn't make much sense, the camera angles and editing were fine but the narrative was hard to follow.
now I'm keeping the first section of my first draft the same, the first 30 seconds or so, then I'm continuing on with my new plot from there.
in my previous post:
http://lutterworthasdanituffen0910.blogspot.com/2010/03/target-audience.html

i said that one of the reasons I'd changed was because of target audience, its true that for me it would be easier to aim for that target audience but my teacher doesn't think that first my style and neither do i, so by going back I'm aiming for my original target audience which was both genders and an age range of 16 to 20.

I'm going to use this as inspiration for the credits in my opening, this goes on for the same amount of time that my opening needs to go on for so i can see how i can make mine look.
i can do the shots, lighting and credits like this easily, but I'm going to have issues with music, i already have music for my first 30 to 50 seconds, but I'm still looking for music for the rest of it, i edit to music a lot at home so its one of my strong points but its difficult to find music like the music used in this opening



i get a lot of ideas for one film opening, but when i try to put them together i end up losing the narrative because i focus on the editing and videoing to much, with this new idea I'm planning it in depth and sticking strictly to it.

the plot of the new idea is as follows:

• it starts with a girl dead/just been killed.
• the story is from a detective's point of view
• the plot follows the detective trying to hunt down the serial killer as the number of victims piles up
• each victim is killed right outside there homes which suggests the killer stalks his victims before he kills them
• it ends with the killer being found out, after following a pattern of clues left on every victim and the links between each victim, e.g the first and the second victim knew each other

Target audience

One of the reasons why i changed my idea was because i'd lost inspiration in my orginal idea and my teacher had said that the genre wasn't quite right, so i decided to aim for a smaller target audience. Chick flicks are specifically aimed at woman so i decided to switch to that instead.

Idea changes...again...again.

im changing my idea again, this time completely, with a completely new genre, i decided to do a test idea first, and compare with my first idea and see which opening people liked better, my newest idea is the one that people like more and i think i can do a lot more with it as my first idea stopped making sense.

editing and videoing i can do easily, but i get a lot of ideas at once and they dont really make sense, so in the time i've got left im researching my new opening from the beginning.



the first two minutes of confessions of a shopaholic are pretty simple, the shots are long and drawn out and slightly slowed down, probably because its a memory,

the feedback i'd gotten on my new idea with the editing i'd done so far was that it hadn't really got a plot, i know in my head whats going on but i can't convey it to the audience, so im going to use a voice over.

what is the diffrenece between a film opening and a film trailer?

Film openings

• Enigma codes (hook) - Barthes theory
• Focus on hero/main character (Propps theory)
• Establishing shot for setting - action shots character in role/doing something
• hint towards disequilibrium (Todorov) but not necessary for 2 minutes
• variety of shots
• titles
• makes the audience want to continue watching
• everything works together (music fits genre)

Film Trailer

• provides a summary of film plot (outline - without ending)
• character roles are more defined
• short varied clips from the entire film
• clear idea about equilibrium and disequilibrium
• music as a selling tool

storyboard edit, new shots

i couldn't do the shots in school because the people i wanted to be in it weren't free when i was free and i couldn't organize time after school because they work and having things to do, but they are free on Sundays and as I'm already doing shots at church i decided to do some other shots at church as well. the good thing about changing where I'm filming means that i have a lot more freedom to what i want without disturbing anyone, if i was filming in school it would probably be during lesson times so few classrooms would be free and filming might disturb lessons and there are a lot more people to get in the way.

i wanted to keep the fade in fade out transition between the doors closing and opening in so i had to work out how i could do that without changing the plot or setting to much,

Editing

I've done the first 29 seconds of my film opening and realy happy with how it looks, the first part is easy to do, but im having problems organizing people to the next section, the scene set in the church can only be filmed on a sunday so i have very limited times to do it in,

11 of my shots are set in the church so the vast majority of my filming needs to be done on a sunday the rest can all be done in school, but most people dont have free's the same time as me so i will have to organize some time after school quickly.

Pitch

Pitch

View more presentations from DaniGoRawr.

My pitch for my orginal idea :D

prop changes

in my new storyboard, the idea was that there was a mysterious book, that was worth a lot of money, because of time limits and everything i've changed it to a laptop bag, this also means i can add a lot more shots in because i can do shots of people taking the laptop out of the bag even though im sure that all the shots i've already done will fill up the two minutes easily

Opening test

testing out my idea for the opening the full audio track is actually exactly 2:01 minutes long so i could do the whole opening with no other audio, but i think that'd be boring so around 1 minute the song fades out and theres some conversation and a different track starts up.

Titles test and new script

Credits test first! this was kind of the image that i had in mind, its just a basic mock-up of what I'm going to do and testing out transitions and the best effects to use, it still needs tweaking slightly i don't think the "CCTV camera effect" is right i think it needs to be in black and white and maybe slightly jumpy, also the text isn't right i think I'll look for some different texts to use.

Script

i mainly changed my project so i could base it around music rather then speech, dialogue tends to let people down so I'm using as little as possible.

Shot 16: Close up on student sat in front of mysterious person - "I hear they play drums during services"

Shot 17: Close up on the mysterious person - "Only to those who can hear them"

this is the sign to let the student know he/she has got the right person.

Shot 20: high angled point of view shot on mysterious person, who looks up at the student and takes the book - "Pleasure doing business."

Changing Idea

after watching some other students videos and working out the time i had to do the project in i didn't look like i would get it done in time so I've changed how im doing it slightly, its the same plot same characters but from a totally different perspective, before it started with the two main good guys and there race to the shop how im changing it so that it is from the bad guys point of view, i've also given the over all story more of a plot in doing so.

my new plot is that the bad guys have stolen a very very valuable book, and intend to use it to get money from the government or owner of said book. i've now made the character who has stolen the book and the main good guy related, the good guy is aware of what his relative is up to but is completely oblivious to the fact that his relative is aware of what he knows and that they're watching him

the storyboard opposite is basically what happens before the original storyboard, in the very last shot you can see the good guy go on the computer, that would be where my original storyboard started but having watched other openings more closely and doing my test shots i think that my original idea isn't good enough and its also difficult to keep the clips shot while having credits mixed into them

i think seeing the bad guy before the good guys makes a much better hook as well.
one of the key things to my opening is music, after watching other peoples videos one of the huge flaws is that the audio quality of dialogue is terrible. my previous idea had a lot of speech in it and i had planned on getting a separate recording thing so i could film while recording the voice from close up but i couldn't find anything suitable so by changing my idea and using music as the base Audio i can use minimal dialogue to maximum effect, the only real speech in my knew idea is during the church scene when only 20 something words are said between two people before music starts back up again and credits start again.
Our teacher said that the feedback they got from the exam board last year was that the credits weren't creative enough...so i went all out.

most of my new idea is set indoors, with no particular time of day this is so that im not restricted with time limits, i have a paper round that i do and it takes an hour by the time i get home its already dark and im busy for a lot of weekends around deadlines so by setting it in doors i can film whenever i have time. i also moved some scenes to school because i can film in school hours as well by doing that and it gives me plenty of time to edit and re-film if necessary.

Below is my rough test shots for my previous idea, i think its alright, but it just doesn't feel right to me and i don't think it flows. one of my pet peeves is when videos don't fit together very well.

Storyboard new shots to be added

between shot 10 and 11, characters just joined together, shot of them running down a path together, in time with music, cut sections out of the shot so they're running away jumps slightly giving a jumpy effect.

Rought Script

Shot 20
First dialogue: Character B – Noise on impact with lamp-post
Shot 21
Character A Sighs when she realizes that character B has run into the lamp-post
Shot 22
Character A Helps character B up while laughing
“thats gonna hurt in the morning”
Shot 24
Character A checks her watch
“Woah! The time!”
Shot 26
Both characters run to shop, get there and find it closed
Character A: “I knew it!, that’s your fault.”
Character B: “you were the one who dragged me out!”
Shot 27
(from inside the shop so the audio is slight muffled)
Character A: “you ran into the lamp post!”
Character B: “Touché”
Shot 28
(long shot)
Character A: “Ugh, come on lets just go home”
Shot 29
(conversation while walking away from shop)
Character B: “we could always get some tomorrow”
Character A: “Nah, i just fancied some now”
Character B: “we could go to morri-ways”
Character A: “To expencive.”
Character B: “what a waste of time that was!”
Character A: “ exercise is good for you.”
Character B: “Not after school on a Monday ni-
(insert noise/scream both turn around)
Shot 35
Character A: “oh thats not good...” (whispered to each other)
Character B: “what do we do?”
Character A: “run” (shouted)

Production company logo finished

took about 10 minutes to put together in sony vegas, i dont know whether to put any sound effects on it, i probably will eventually though

Storyboard edit

Production company logo.

this is the Logo that i came up with originally, this is just a basic still image version of it though, the images below will all be part of a movie symbol that I'll edit together in Sony Vegas at home

i called the company "Jet productions" because one of the big things local to me is Frank Whittles invention of the jet engine, the spiral above goes in the centre of the circle below and will rotate continuously while the text appears

Storyboard Edit

im taking one of the shots out because it doesnt make sense and it would be more effective to not have it in at all.

Characters

I'm getting some friends from out of school to be my actors, this is both good and bad because it means i can only film outside of school hours but also means that I have to organise dates a head of time so filming will be more organised and i can time manage better. the characters i have in mind are as follows
Character A - Charlotte Bradshaw, the main character
Character B - Ieuan Pope, the second main character, the one who runs into the lamp-post
Character C - Emily Jones, the victim
Character D - Gillian Gamble, one of the bad guys
Character E - Darius O'Neill, bad guy/shop owner

all of them have agreed to be in it, so I'm organising days that we can all meet up and do the filming

Sherlock Holmes

I've mentioned before that i want to use a mystery novel (preferably Sherlock Holmes) in one of my shots, this was perfectly timed because the new Sherlock Holmes film came out and me and a friend went to see it. it has both my genres in it + action and the very first opening scene was a chase scene in which the characters identity is hidden just like my opening.

because its the first movie some people don't know what the actor who's playing Holmes looks like, me being one of these people i didn't know what was going on in the opening, to me it looked like a scruffy man being chased by the police but it turned out to be Holmes running in front of the police to stop the main bad guy from doing something. I'm doing something like this in my opening, I'm making the "Good guys" look like the bad guys

the mystery element of the film kept me on the edge of my seat through-out, and by the end i was actually convinced the main bad guy could use magic, then all was revealed by Holmes towards the end only to be left with a cliff hanger ending about a second bad guy that made appearances in the film. there are a lot of times when your sat watching thinking "what on earth is Holmes doing" and then at the end he shows you why he did it, it keeps the audience hooked.

the comedy was clever, one of my favourite parts that made me laugh was a giant french bad guy who's out to get Holmes picks up a huge hammer used on making a ship, Holmes grabs a tiny hammer and there's a long shot allowing the audience to see the difference in size between both Holmes and the bad guy and there hammers, in frustration Holmes just throws his hammer at the man and does no damage what so ever and ends up almost getting squished by the boat-in-progress.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=QUQbmFAE5WI

the hammer scene starts at 1:43 in the trailer above, the embedding was disabled.
the trailer below is slightly different but i could embed it so i'll post both

mood board

a mood board of some things that i am including in my opening and where i've taken idea's from.
things i've circled in read:
Sherlock Holmes - mystery novel, possibly being used as a prop in within the first 10 shots
Hot fuzz swan chase - a funny chase scence, same comedy im using in my opening
Lamp post - Lamp post scene
closed sign - closed sign of the shop in my opening
Hot fuzz sunglasses - Main point is the sunglasses that the bad guy will actually be wearing despite there being (hopefully) little to no sun

Storyboard

i did my storyboard completely on photoshop and did each shot in a separate file so that if i wanted to change anything i could just make a new file, finish it then drag it over the top of the old one and I'd still have the original image to show changes.

in the 18Th shot, i drew in the hoodies that the characters will be wearing. hoodies to hide there identity this is so that there is enigma codes as to who the main characters are and what they are doing, the black hoodies also make the audience think that the characters are up to no good when actually they are the good guys.